Eight Bad Dates
by Blue Saturday
Summary: In retrospect, it was probably a bad idea for Chris to set Trent up with such crazy girls...


**Guess, what, guys? This is my _ninth _story, so it goes without saying that it is dedicated to Trent...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Total__ Drama._**

* * *

The Drama Brothers' faces used to be everywhere. Their simple songs would be played constantly on the radio, and they were able to sell out stadiums in less than three minutes. Unfortunately, due to an unfortunate nude incident that resulted in community service, and some stupid British boy band, this was no longer the case. The posters of The Drama Brothers that hung in teenaged girls' rooms were slowly being replaced by ones of a different band, and their fragrance had even been pulled out of several department stores due to lack of sales. They were losing money fast, and in order to stop the bleeding, their manager, the one and only Chris Mclean, had decided to take drastic measures.

Chris wasn't an idiot. He knew that Harold McGrady and Cody Anderson had sold little to no merchandise. Girls apparently didn't find them "attractive" enough. Justin was pretty cute, but he spent most of his time staring at himself in a mirror, not exactly very appealing, personality wise. Chris's only hope to save this band fell into the hands of Trent Adams.

Trent was one of those naturally cool guys. He had that sensitive guitar-boy image that girls just seemed to gush over, and was currently single. Looking over at him, as the band rehearsed that dumb 'When I Cry' song (seriously, who wrote those lyrics?), Chris knew what he needed to do. He called Trent over to tell him about his "brilliant" plan.

"Trent, brah, you're single, right?" He had asked the guitar player, trying to coax him into the idea.

"Yes, Chris. I think that you know that," Was Trent's obvious response.

"Right, but how you like to, I dunno, not be?"

"Look, man, if you're trying to set me up with that Dakota girl again, you should know that I'm not really...interested," Trent said, declining what was sure-to be Chris's terrible offer. Besides, Dakota was currently dating some gamer guy.

"Nah, dude. I have a better idea," Trent's manager began, slinging his arm around Trent's shoulder. "I was thinking that YOU could pick your next girlfriend. In a televised event that airs, oh I don't know...next Sunday on the Fresh Channel. You and the guys can even play a few songs while you're there…"

"I'm not so sure about that, Chris…" Trent feebly protested.

"Well, you don't really have a choice!" Chris said. "Girl's eat you up, man. So We're going to post the idea on Twitter or whatever, and the first couple of people in line will have a shot at you until you find the one. Speed dating, brah." He told Trent a few more miscellaneous details, such as the time and the place. Then sent the man off to work on his music, because God knows that they needed it.

* * *

When Sunday had finally rolled around, Trent found himself sitting at a table in some empty restaurant being harassed by the hair and makeup artists Chris had hired to make Trent look "somewhat decent." Chris had ran through the day with him once again, and a line of girls and some guys had already formed outside. The camera crew had come in, taking queues from Chris, the self-proclaimed "host" of the day, while the remaining members of The Drama Brothers sat on a stage a little while away.

Trent watched the clock on the wall click off until it hit five o'clock and a crew member opened the door, revealing Trent's first date of the evening. The rules were simple. Each girl had five minutes with the bachelor, and once the guitarist found a girl that he liked, the speed dating would be over. The first girl, however, didn't exactly seem like a winner.

She was wearing a short-sleeve workout suit, despite it being February with snow on the ground. And, oh she looked like she could bench press a couple hundred pounds if she wanted to. The buff girl sat down, rather forcefully in the empty seat across from Trent with a scowl planted upon her face. Trent, being the nice guy that he was, decided to make some light conversation.

"Nice to meet you. My name is-"

"Yeah. I know who you are," she snapped at him, before he could even finish the sentence.

"Okay, Then… Um, what's your name?"

"Eva."

"Eva? What a nice name. So, um, what brought you here?"

"Is it really your business?"

"Oh, well, I'm sure that I can make this enjo-"

"Can you stop talking?" She said while sticking headphones into her ear.

"Look, Eva, I know that you might not want to be here, and all, but there is no reason to be rude-" That must have been the wrong thing to say, because the girl looked like she wanted to murder the band member.

"Rude? Do you want to see rude, you Elvis-wannabe? I can show you rude!" Eva lunged for Trent, only to be taken down by Chef Hatchet, Chris Mclean's personal bodyguard who had been assigned to look out for the crazies. Eva certainly fit that description. As she was being escorted out of the restaurant, Chris appeared, seemingly out of no where, to announce that they were taking a quick commercial break before the next date.

Chris then proceeded to go over to Trent's table and smear some hair gel onto the man's head. "Remember dude, product placement is everything, so make sure that you tell the next date what brand of gel you're using…" He directed his client.

"Chris, I'm not really sur-"

"And on today the next date!" his manager had interrupted, escorting a seemingly nice, slightly-overweight girl in a pink hoodie to the table. "Trent, meet Staci!" He exclaimed, shoving the girl into the seat across from him. "And remember what I said about the hair gel dude," he whispered to Trent before stalking off to wherever he had been before.

"Hi, Staci, I'm Trent! Nice to meet you!" He said as he took a sip of his water.

"You know, my great, great, great, great, great, great, great-" she paused to take a breath. "Great, great, great, great grandfather was the one who discovered that water was safe to drink."

"Um...That's...neat, Staci….What do you like to do?" He questioned not really believing the entire water thing.

"Well, I like to watch television. My great great uncle twice-removed invented it, you know."

"Your great uncle is Philo Farnsworth…?" Trent asked, unsure of what to say to the girl.

"Um, not exactly."

"...Well...Chris's, uh, hair gel is nice…"

"Oh! My great, great aunt invented hair gel. It was kind of an accident anyways, but think God she did. Anyways, I also like to read, as my eight times great grandfather was the one who first thought of the idea for a book…" And that is how the rest of their short date went, with Staci blatantly lying about her family's past and Trent trying to cut into the conversation. It felt like five hours, not five minutes, had gone by the time Chris told Staci to beat it and introduced Trent's next date, or um, dates.

Another chair had been half-hazardly placed at the table as two squealing girls walked in wearing shirts with...Trent's face on them? "Trent, meet Katie and Sadie!"

"Uh, Chris, I thought that I was only supposed to go on a date with one of them…"

"You were, but they refused to be separated-"

"Yeah, like I would die without my BFFFL here!" The larger one of the two girls cut in.

"Totes! I soooo need Sadie by my side for this!"

"Right," Chris continued, clearly annoyed that he had been cut off by the pair of idiots. "Besides, after your terrible hair-gel plug, I think that you can endure the company of two lovely ladies," Chris told him before leaving.

"So...I'm Trent," he introduced, smiling uncomfortably at the pair.

"Ohmigosh, ohmigosh he's talking to us!" The tan one fangirled.

"We're sitting across from Trent Adams, the Trent Adams, Katie!" The other one said, Trent frowned, as they seemed too excited to be there to actually talk to him.

"I see that you two are fans!" Well, this was refreshing, as his two previous didn't really seem to care about who he was.

"Trent we are, like, your biggest fans!"

"Yes! We sooo love you!"

"That's nice, girls. I appreciate it!"

"EEEEE! OHMIGOSH, Katie, did you hear that!?"

"Yesss! Trent, like, appreciates us!"

"Oh man, I'm so excited! I can't wait to go home and listen to The Drama Brothers after this!"

"Yes! And watch their movie again!"

"You guys have seen my band's-"

"EEEE! He's talking to us again, Sadie!"

"He is soooo cute!"

"The cutest!" The began to squeal again. Well, this was weird. Trent couldn't even get a word in!

"Do you think that he'll pick us to be his girlfriends?"

"Hey, girls, I-"

"Totes! I'm going to be Trent Adams's girlfriend!"

"No...I am!"

"Girls, I, uh-"

"Yeah, right! Trent has totally been checking out me the entire time!"

"God, Katie, you are sooo full of yourself!"

"Um, you know, I'm-"

"This is like the fan fiction all over again!"

"Fan fiction? Katie, Sa-"

"See? He said my name, he clearly likes me better!"

"Well, Trent was about to say my name before you rudely interrupted him! God Katie do you have like any manners?"

"Girls-"

"Do you know what, Sadie?"

"What?"

"I really don't think that I'm worth breaking a frie-"

"I think that you are just jealous of the bond that Trent and I clearly have!"

"Well, Katie, do you know what I think?"

"Sadie, there is no need to retal-"

"What?"

"I think that you are a-"

"And, time!" Chris said, directing Chef to escort the wonder twins out.

"Oh my God that is, like, totes not fair!"

"Yeah, we barely got to talk to Trent!"

"Yeah, I don't care," Chris said as the two were carried out of the restaurant. "Anyways, our next, hopefully more normal, date is Lindsay!" She was gorgeous, with doe-like eyes, and silky blonde hair. She looked like a real life, walking, Barbie doll. "Not too shabby, eh?"

Lindsay sat down, facing the wrong direction. "Um, where is Trevor?"

"I'm over here, Lindsay," he called over to the blonde. "And my name is Trent…" The girl turned around, and a smile lit up her face. Well, at least she was friendly.

"Oh my gosh, hi Tanner! You look, like, really familiar. I think that I saw you at my sister, Paula's party!"

"Um, no, I don't think that was it, Lindsay," Trent chuckled. "I'm actually in The Drama Brothers…"

"What is that?" She asked, completely clueless as to what was going on.

"We're a band…"

"Oh, like, a boy band!? Duh, I totally remember now! I love your 'What Makes You Beautiful' song!"

"That's not us…" He could almost see Chris facepalming himself from wherever he was.

"Oh," she frowned. "Who are you again?"

"Trent Adams, from The Drama Brothers…" He looked at her, unsure of what to say next. If she didn't even know who he was, then why on Earth was she even here?

"Wait!" She began to panic. "You're not Tyler?"

"Tyler? Lindsay, who is Tyler?" Could a girl really be this stupid?

"My boyfriend, duh!"

"Boyfriend?"

"Yeah, Tommy! I mean, I like you and all, but you're sooo not my Tyler-bear!" God, she really was an idiot.

"I'm sorry that I'm not Tyler, Lindsay…"

"Oh my God, do you know where he is?"

"Uh…" Trent glanced over at the camera for a second, silently pleading Chris to end this date.

He knew that it was only going to be a few more minutes, but Lindsay was just confused. She stared at him again, blinking a few times before asking him what they were doing again. Trent ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"Lindsay, you're on a date with me..."

"Oh! Tyler?!"

"No, Lindsay, I'm Trent."

"Wait, where's Tyler, then?"

"Uh-"

His prayers were answered when his manager appeared at the table, telling Lindsay to beat it, and that they were going to take another commercial break.

"Chris, none of these girls seem too into me…" He complained to his manager.

"I don't know, brah, maybe you should try harder…"

"I think that I'm being a gentleman...I don't know, man, this seems like a bad idea…"

"Yeah, but it's good for publicity. Especially since you guys haven't had a hit after your stupid 'When I Cry' song."

"I guess so…"

"Anyways, I'm going to bring out the next girl, so just...I don't know, make conversation or something." Before Trent could respond, the cameras began rolling again. Chris went on about the dates for their upcoming North American tour, before introducing some red head. Izzy.

"Hi-"

" Ohwowyou'rethatguyinthebandnowandertherewassuchalineoutsidehahaha"

"Um...Could you slow down a bit…"

"What? Sorry Am I talking too fast because I get that a lot ha ha ha." She was practically jumping up and down as she spoke.

"So, Izzy-"

"You know that I have a spider suit in my bag because I like to scare this kid I know named Cameron…"

"What?"

"Yeah. When I was little my brothers used to stick me in a dog crate when my parents weren't home to keep me from destroying the house. Ruff."

"Uh...So what brought you here?"

"Oh, well, you see I saw the line outside and figured that it must have been something important so I just kind of followed it."

"So...you don't care about The Drama Brothers either…"

"Nope, not really," she said before shifting her eyes towards the stage with the other band members and looking at Trent rather seriously. "You know that Justin guy?"

"Yeah…"

"He's evil! I tell you! EVIL! PURE EVIL!" As she said that she began to hiss. Cursing out Justin for even existing.

"Um…he's an okay guy-"

"NO." Izzy snapped. "He uses his pretty boy powers to trick people into handing over millions of dollars to him. Don't trust him," she said with a crazed look in her eyes.

"Izzy...did that ever actually happen?"

"I dunno, but we did used to date and he is a bad dude! Izzy will stop him at all cost!" And, like that, she catapulted out of her seat, making a mad dash towards the stage, screaming about how she was going to 'take down the pretty boy'. Chef Hatchet was on her tail, but Izzy seemed to be one step ahead. She grabbed Justin's mirror and smashed it, before bolting out of the restaurant, with Chef close behind. It goes without saying that Trent's dates were going well.

Chris cut to yet another commercial break, as they left to find Izzy and have her arrested. Plus, Justin was about to cry, and that might ruin their image even more.

After the chaos had settled down, the next date was brought out, and they simply just were not what Trent was expecting. For starters, he was a boy. Some scrawny kid named Noah who was carrying around a copy of a book the size of Trent's head.

"Uh…"

"Yes, Einstein, I am a guy," he said in a sarcastic tone.

"Ar-"

"Yes, I am gay, and no you are not my type," he said, while cracking open the book that he brought along with him.

"Then why are you here?"

"I came with Izzy," he replied, uncaring.

"Well, I'm Trent Adams…"

"Wow, I couldn't tell that from all of the posters, or seeing you on tv, or the guy with all of the hair gel saying 'hey, brah, this is Trent' before I sat down."

"Right…" The rest of the date went by in silence as Noah flipped through his book. Chris finally cut it short because it was 'boring' and they were 'losing ratings' due to it. And this was only date six.

The next girl seemed normal enough. She had long, purple hair that was tied up into a ponytail and seemed genuinely excited to be there. Her name was Sierra, and before Trent could get a word out, she took control of the conversation.

"I am the The Drama Brothers biggest fan," she announced to him.

"Well, that's neat! Is that why you're here?"

"Yes, and no."

"Great. So, tell me about yourself…"

"Well, for starters, I know everything about you guys. I run like ten blogs dedicated to each of you…"

"Okay…"

"Cody Anderson is my favorite."

"Really?" Sierra glared at him. And, Trent really didn't mean to sound rude about it, but Cody was hardly a fan favorite.

"Yes, really!" Sierra exclaimed. "I even dyed my hair the exact color of his bruises…"

"Um…"

"Can I ask you questions for my blog?"

"Sure?"

"What is Cody like? From your perspective?"

"Uh, well...He's a nice guy. The fedora can be a bit much at times-"

"I like the fedora!" She interrupted.

"Well, I'm sure that he would be happy to hear that… Anyways, Cody can be funny, he's like an annoying little brother, I guess."

"Cody is not annoying!" Sierra snapped. "Anyways, do you know how many freckles he has on his back?"

"What?"

"For my blog."

"Oh. Um...no?"

"Oh. Well, what kind of deodorant does Cody use?"

"I haven't checked lately…" She seemed disappointed by his answer.

"Okay, well this one is important. How many times, on average, does Cody sleep facing West?"

"Uh, sorry, Sierra. I don't really stay up at night watching Cody sleep…"

"Well, do you at least know what song he sings in the shower?"

"'When I Cry' maybe…?"

"Oh, man! He's just so cute!" Trent sighed.

"Do you want to meet him?"

"YES." They both stood up, and Trent walked Sierra over to the stage where Cody was hanging out.

"Hey, Cody?"

"Yeah, man?"

"This is Sierra. She is a really big fan of yours and I think that it would mean a lot to her if you could talk to her a for a bit…"

"Yeah, no problem, man. Anything for the ladies!" Sierra immediately began to hyperventilate upon talking to Cody. She latched onto him and went into a rant about how she was so excited to meet him, and how she had imagined this moment everyday since she first heard his band. Cody seemed taken back by all of the attention that he was getting, and Trent decided to leave it at that.

When he returned to his table, Chris had already announced the next girl that he was to get to know; a slim, Asian girl by the name of Heather.

"Hi, I'm Trent."

"Heather," she said with disinterest. "Charmed."

"So, where are you from?" He asked, she at least seemed normal.

"Quebec City," okay, so he didn't really seem to interested to be here, either, but at least she wasn't crazy.

"I take it that you're a fan of The Drama Brothers?"

"Euch. As if. I'm just here because I wanted to speak to your asshole manager, not to hook up with some stupid pop boy band member," Heather scoffed.

"Hey, you don't need to be rude about it!"

"Whatever. I'm just telling it as it is. I figured that Mclean could help me get on Broadway through my ballet or my own reality show or something," she began, narrowing her eyes at Trent. "Because if anyone from this crappy country DESERVES to be famous it is definitely me!" Alright, so Heather was a total bitch. Lucky Trent.

"Well, if that's going to be your attitude, then maybe you should just leave!"

"Please. We still have like three minutes left. And I am NOT leaving until I see your manager again!" Trent, at this point, just wanted to bang his head into the wall. This day was going terrible. They didn't talk for about a minute or so before Chris finally came out, worried about the ratings. He agreed to meet with Heather some other time, as long as she would leave. Which she did, after scheduling a meeting.

It had been eight dates. Eight miserable dates, but the evening was far from over. Trent wasn't so sure how much more that he could take of this before he would have to leave due to insanity. The next girl that walked in was wearing a black corset-skirt combination and her hair was streaked teal. She slid into the open seat and introduced herself as Gwen.

"Gwen's a beautiful name," he complimented, watching as a light blush spread across the girl's pale cheeks. She was kind of cute.

"Thanks," she said.

"You don't seem like the type of girl that would be too into The Drama Brothers…"

"Oh, you'd be surprised…" Gwen stated. He didn't need to know that she really couldn't care less about his stupid band and that they only reason that she was here was because she had lost a bet with her friend, Duncan. In her defense, however, it was a total shock to everyone when Courtney Martinez hooked up with him. Anyways, Duncan happened to be just outside, probably laughing his ass off at Gwen's situation.

"So, gorgeous, what kind of things are you into?" He asked, with a small smile on her face. Gwen didn't seem to be crazy, stupid, or a bitch. She actually seemed pretty cool. And, hey, nine _was_ Trent's lucky number.

"Well, I like to draw a lot…"

"That's pretty neat. I bet you're amazing at it,"

" I'm not that good…"

"I'd love to see it, sometime," he said. They began to talk about art, and Gwen's life and such. Those five minutes practically flew by. When Chris came around, asking if Trent was ready for the next girl, he could hardly believe it.

"You know, Chris," he had told him. "I think that I'm just going to continue my date with this one- those were the rules after all." Chris sighed, and did the closing of the show, while Trent and Gwen carried on their conversation in the restaurant. Chris's idea might not have saved The Drama Brothers, especially with Harold's talk about going solo with a beat-boxing album, and Trent may have had to sit through eight terrible dates, but at least he had one pretty good one.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**And, fin~**

**Well, I bet you guys are sick of seeing my name on the archive now :p I'm on vacation, so I have a bit more free time...**

**I really had a lot of fun writing this. It was originally going to be Noah on all of these dates, but then I realized that my ninth story was coming up and it just had to be about Trent. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if I wrote the Noah one later...**

**Fun Facts:**

**1. All of the questions that Sierra asked Trent were actually things that she mentioned wanting to know on the show (I think the manhunt episode, but not sure)**

**2. Lindsay does have a sister named Paula also...**

**3. Katie and Sadie's was my favorite part to write, but I love Katie and Sadie... I kind of alluded to one of my other stories in their part also...**

**4. I had to give Trent a happy ending after making him sit through that...I'm not even that big of a Gwent fan, I prefer Gwuncan to most couples in the show, actually, and I can hear the collective gasps of everyone who has seen me post a Duncney fic onto this site.**

**5. Also, Izzy did date Justin in canon too, or she claims to have, but I'm not sure if that was revealed on a bonus clip or in an aftermath...**

**6. This is getting long, I'm sorry...**

**7. Also, 'When I Cry' was The Drama Brothers only actual hit and the lyrics were pretty laughable.**

**Anyways, thank you for reading about Trent's terrible dates, I hope that you enjoyed it ^^**

**Jen-**


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